Clinical Time

Yesterday I did my clinical hours for my EMT-b certification at the wonderful American Fork Hospital.

I spent 10 hours in the ER. It was a decent time. After 10 hours in a hospital, I've come to some conclusions.

MEDICINE IS RAD



I actually had a lot of fun, and I could see myself working in a hospital type setting. I didn't get to do a whole lot, but I saw a lot of people being helped. I like that.

SCRUBS ARE SEXY



I don't know what it is about a girl in scrubs. It's just incredibly attractive to me. Good thing I'm dating a nurse.

By the way... If you do a Google Images search for nurse, don't add a modifier such as "hot" or "sexy"... The pictures are kinda of naughty. Seriously. Don't click those links.

I LIKE BABIES



There were a couple cases involving small children. One was having trouble breathing. He was gasping and wheezing between sobs. It broke my heart. It was the only thing that affected me. I saw dying people, doctors doing stitches on big cuts, burns and lots of blood. The kid tripped me out though.

So thanks AF ER for taking good care of me and showing me a good time in your hospital.

Hunting the world's most dangerous creature...

I recently found out that I passed my background investigation for the United States Border Patrol. I'm supposed to be getting an EOD (entrance on duty) date within the next 30-60 days. Here's a taste of what I'll be doing for a job.

Shaking hands with various ex-presidents of the US (while on horseback, of course)


Shooting large and expensive weapons. (And free unlimited ammo)


Driving boats and stuff.


Get a 4x4 truck, dunebuggy, or quad and unlimited gas to go drive around.


Snake wrangling (not the most dangerous creature)

I get paid to do this crap. Are you kidding me?

Ma, I got the swine.

I may or may not have swine flu.

I'll spare you the vomitous details, but I got pretty sick last night. I finally was able to fall asleep around 4am, and when I woke up I actually felt pretty great, but by the time church rolled around I was feeling pretty poopy again, so I broke out after sacrament so as not to infect the entire ward.

Too bad I don't have a wife. I would have her rub my belly and make me soup. Where are you wife?

Wrong Drivethru

So one day I was driving around and I decided to stop for something to eat. I pulled into the drive thru with my mind made up already. I didn't even look at the menu, I just pulled up to the crackly voice box thing and confidently ordered.

Me- "I'd like a guacamole bacon burger please."

Drive thru guy - "Well, if you want to, you can drive down the road to Carl's Jr and they can probably get one of those for you. But we actually don't serve those here."

Me- "Huh? Where am I?"

DtG- "Burger King."

Me - "Ah crap..." (Sound of car speeding away)

One of my blondest moments for sure. At least it was the drive thru so they didn't see my face.

I just went to Subway instead.

On a side note, the guacamole bacon 6 dollar burger is absolutely delicious.
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The Bar Scene

Apparently its been 8 months since I updated my blog...

I've been getting in trouble so I'm posting. I'm sitting here in Park City with some good friends.

It's "glamour" night at Harry-O's, so there are girls in bikini's and furry hooker boots dancing on the bar (pictures NOT included). Not my scene. We didn't stay long.

We went down a couple doors to the No Name Saloon where instead of trance rave music they were playing Led Zeppelin. Now we're talking. That's where the picture comes from. I don't do the bar scene very often, and everytime I do I am reminded why I don't. But I'm with friends, so I'm having fun. Besides, someone's gotta drive.

Maybe I'll be a little better about updating this thing. Sorry guys.
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That just happened...

I don't make this stuff up.



This is pretty funny. I wish I knew who did it...

Malibu

I have been gone a very long time. I apologize. I've spent the last couple of months scouring the internet for the best videos that I could find though, and I've got two gems for you. The first is just in time for Christmas. Both have a Malibu theme. Enjoy.






This next gem just blows my mind. I think it will blow yours too.





You can thank me later for enriching your life with these videos.
I wonder if you can download "In the Bu" for Rockband...